Hampstead Heath is a lovely place, and so thought Liza Brown
So last Bank Holiday she with her pals went down
They crowded round the rifle butts, some got cigars and some got nuts
But Liza wouldn't be satisfied until she had a donkey ride.

Chorus: When Liza got on the donkey all the boys began to chaff
They spotted Liza's calf, it was a calf - not half
Then off she fell - showing her frills and flounces
And all the fellows began to cry, 'What ho! she bounces!'

The donkey looked at Eliza and Eliza eyed the moke
For she weighed eighteen stone, he couldn't see the joke
To keep her seat in vain she tried, but kept on slipping round the side
Once more the people began to quiz, you couldn't see the moke for Liz.


Eighteen stone of Eliza thought she'd have another pop
But down they tumbled with the donkey on the top
And there was Eliza - quite a wreck, with arms around the donkey's neck
The sight was funny, the crowd all laughed, and LIza- well she felt a draught

Performed by Marie Kendall (1873-1964)
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